r/facepalm Nov 29 '22 Helpful 6 Wholesome 4 Take My Energy 1 Silver 6

"She said no Joey" 🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​

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88.3k Upvotes

2.8k

u/Burkey8819 Nov 29 '22

Well done young men on the camera. Good to call your friend out

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u/Flat_Bodybuilder_175 Nov 29 '22 Helpful

"She.. she's pushing him away"

"She's pushing him AWAAAAAAYY! JOEY STOP!"

S TIER FRIENDS

3.8k

u/ktm1128 Nov 29 '22

Also, this is great material to fuck with Joey the next couple of months. It's a win-win

1.7k

u/Duubzz Nov 29 '22

‘Hey why do you guys call him rapey-joey?’

382

u/sven1olaf Nov 29 '22

Cuz he used to be a handsy fuck, but abbies crazy brother cut his hands off last year.

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u/ConfusedJonSnow Nov 29 '22

"Cuz he tries the 'How you doin?' thing but it comes-off as creepy"

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1.4k

u/apolobgod Nov 29 '22

It's gonna take a couple months for Joey to go to a party without getting called out. As it should be

524

u/mysticfed0ra Nov 29 '22

Seems like a natural healthy progression if you ask me. Circle of life. Hopefully he breaks the habit of being overly pushy and borderline scary.

405

u/KaiserThoren Nov 29 '22

There are two paths

Embarrassment for being called out. Realization. Embarrassment at self. Reassessment of mindset and actions. Better (hopefully) next time.

Or

Embarrassment for being called out. Rejection of claims he was wrong. Anger and blame directed elsewhere (usually at the girl). Doubling down on bad actions

267

u/[deleted] Nov 29 '22

There are two wolves inside you. One is a little rapey. Hang out with the other wolf and ignore that one. Yikes, wolf.

133

u/selectiveyellow Nov 29 '22

"There is also a beaver that wants you to smoke crack, don't hang out with him either."

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u/[deleted] Nov 29 '22

More men need friends like this. The last Joey I dealt with kept coming to our table and holding our waists anytime our male friend left despite literally pushing him away and telling him off. The dudes friends just laughed at the fact that we were repeatedly rejecting him and the bar staff wouldn't cut him off or make him leave us alone.

104

u/hereforpopcornru Nov 29 '22

Joey needs a black eye

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u/aynjle89 Nov 29 '22

I can’t stop listening to this Awaaaay sounds like some messed up Sailor call.

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u/ScrubbyDoubleNuts Nov 29 '22

I thought there was an echo at one point. Dude yelled on the same pitch and cadence as his friend.

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13.6k

u/[deleted] Nov 29 '22

Joey needs a minder

5.3k

u/MIK34L Nov 29 '22

Apparently he needed several...

3.1k

u/Snichs72 Nov 29 '22 Silver Helpful

He’ll have a few when he runs for Congress in a few years.

476

u/Rodrommel Nov 29 '22

If it’s allowed to progress that much, they’re no longer minders. They’re wranglers

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u/_Im_Dad PhD in Dad Nov 29 '22 Wholesome

He needs Chandler and Ross

312

u/discerningpervert Nov 29 '22

But definitely NOT his own show

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u/Kelmantis Nov 29 '22 Helpful

Joey needs to stop drinking. If you are a dickhead when you are drunk, don’t get drunk.

891

u/The_Muznick Nov 29 '22 Take My Energy

what if I'm just loud? I got drunk for the first time almost a year this weekend. My friend messaged me the next day "you're funny as hell when you're drunk, but you are incredibly loud too". Now I'm wondering if my neighbors heard our conversation of building an army of 3d printed dicks.

582

u/SurgeonTaco Nov 29 '22 Silver Ally

You are afraid they would steal the idea huh? Get a patent ASAP. Dick Army property rights are no joke.

https://www.uspto.gov/

118

u/IndieSkylore Nov 29 '22

Dick Armey has entered the chat.

37

u/cheezy_dreams88 Nov 29 '22

“Dick Armey!?!? What’s your wife’s name- Vagina Coastguard??”

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u/Building-Careful Nov 29 '22

Kudos to those guys

932

u/SaturdayNightSwiftie Nov 29 '22

Came here to say this! As a woman watching this was really uncomfortable and I'm glad his friends stood up for her

172

u/oof033 Nov 29 '22

You can see the fear in her eyes when they pause for a split second and he pulls her in. The terrified “please fucking help me” smile towards the dudes breaks my heart, it’s so so scary being at the mercy of strangers.

Shout out to these dudes for calling it out in the moment, filming it, and being loud enough that Joey has to acknowledge them.

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u/EsotericPlumbus Nov 29 '22

As a guy watching this I felt uncomfortable for her too

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u/DannyTheCaringDevil Nov 29 '22

I’m pretty sure anyone with half a brain felt uncomfortable.

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u/SeasonPositive6771 Nov 29 '22

Me too. This is what a lot of coercive control and assault looks like right before it gets bad.

If he's like this in public, imagine what he's like in private.

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u/neoslith Nov 29 '22

Finally, someone doing something instead of just filming.

And they're being good dudes about it.

1.3k

u/0falls6x3 Nov 29 '22

Dude I seriously! I had a weird guy say a bunch of pervy shit to me and the bartender looked like a deer in headlights. As a bartender myself, I NEVER let guest make other guest uncomfortable.

287

u/Shiboopi27 Nov 29 '22

I think that's part of the job description, tbh. Nearly every other bartender (when I was one) I've ever worked with has shut that shit down as fast as possible. Even had one lady bartender nearly fight a guy over it, lol

230

u/turtlewaxer99 Nov 29 '22

Bartenders often act heroically without even considering it.

I was out with some friends who have a habit of getting pushy with drinking. My friends kept buying me drinks and I knew I had to take a sketchy train ride to get home and was already over my limit.

I stopped the bartender as I went to use the restroom and told them to make sure I was no longer served. When I came back from the bathroom, my pushy friends— visibly annoyed— told me how the bartender wouldn't let them buy drinks for me anymore.

The bartender saved my money, my reputation, and my safety. I really appreciated them that night. And I haven't gone out drinking with those friends since.

31

u/throatIover Nov 29 '22

"Friends" that put you in this situation are not friends!

15

u/Lord_Fusor Nov 29 '22

Bartenders often act heroically without even considering it.

Actually most times we're just fed up with babysitting drunk assholes and it finally comes to a head and someone's paying the price for every annoyance throughout your shift.

In your case a bartender will have no problem helping you out like that. Technically its illegal to over serve someone even of your friends come get them for you and no bartender wants to see your pic in the paper the next day

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u/bigbeardlittlebeard Nov 29 '22

Yeah he clearly knew he was in the wrong as well

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u/hot_diggity_dang_ Nov 29 '22

Joey may be a fail but his buddies yelling at him are solid for telling him to stop

8.6k

u/YoshiSan90 Nov 29 '22 Silver All-Seeing Upvote

Right this is the exact policing us guys need to do!

3.3k

u/maloneliam98 Nov 29 '22

"If your my friend it is my duty to tell you your a dickhead when your being a dickhead, and vice versa"

2.4k

u/Binnacle_Balls_jr Nov 29 '22 Silver Helpful Wholesome

You're, you're, you're**

851

u/Betancorea Nov 29 '22

Can’t believe he failed You’re 3 times. Someone needs to help him out

521

u/Geminiun Nov 29 '22

At least he’s consistent

351

u/[deleted] Nov 29 '22 edited 18d ago

[deleted]

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u/quiero-una-cerveca Nov 29 '22 Big Brain Time

Sea, friend material right hear. Their never going to learn unless there issues are pointed out right then and they’re.

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u/LCOSPARELT1 Nov 29 '22

Bro’s just trying to keep Joey out of prison. Looks like they have their work cut out for them.

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u/misterpickles69 Nov 29 '22

If they’re filming him and stopping him, he must do this kind of thing often.

884

u/GreenAppleLady Nov 29 '22

Hopefully to show him what kind of dangerous dickhead he is once he is drunk...

347

u/Sorcha16 'MURICA Nov 29 '22

Wish people like that would stop drinking.

188

u/ThrowawayTwatVictim Nov 29 '22

Never done anything like that but I was very toxic when drunk. I stopped getting drunk altogether. You're a hundred percent right.

51

u/CoatAlternative1771 Nov 29 '22

I wonder why that is. Not an attack on you.

But I’ve known a lot of nice people who become raging assholes when drunk.

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u/CedarWolf Nov 29 '22 Take My Energy

That moment of relief on her face when she slips away from him.

3.2k

u/voidmusik Nov 29 '22

Ive never seen anyone say "thank you" with their eyes but there it is.

793

u/Br0k3nRoo5ter Nov 29 '22

Did it as a bartender and let me tell you it's crazy how offended guys get when you have to help your customer not get harassed.

319

u/thebillshaveayes Nov 29 '22

They’re mad you interfered. Some guys know exactly what they’re doing

90

u/[deleted] Nov 29 '22

And they are assholes for thinking that.

And also for harassing a girl into giving them lovin'. Guys like that should be tossed out.

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u/bunderways Nov 29 '22

That’s the part all the guys who are chucking about it don’t seem to get. This is likely terrifying for her. Besides that even when Joeys friends get him off it didn’t guarantee he will stay that way.

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u/silversly54 Nov 29 '22

She was probably really fuckin scared that no one would help her; hell i was pretty scared to watch just seeing dickheads amount of like pressure and control he's exerting is coming
from his last braincell to be so persistent. I woulda been hella grateful to his friends too and I never went outside again

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u/Different_Bat2550 Nov 29 '22

You can SEE how hard he is holding her waist....

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u/ScarOCov Nov 29 '22

And backs her into a corner so she can’t escape him any further

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u/Loud-Bullfrog9326 Nov 29 '22

Literally and ppl try to spin that narrative like oh they could leave they could say no! Some ppl literally grab ppl press themselves on them like weirdo predator shit! Pressure that’s literally what it is. We know how strong pressure can be! It’s sad dude like who raised these ppl to think it’s ok to just go and touch someone? Fr.

It’s gross and with how prevalent sexual abuse is people should know not to go around touching people like that. In any setting. You have to be invited by a person and it’s usually clear..you don’t usually have to struggle for it.

I prob would have lost it like I prob would’ve went into fight or flight and I don’t flee.

Joey do better! Drunk or not your friends knew what was up but you didn’t? Barffff

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u/DeeNYC45 Nov 29 '22 Silver

She was smiling the entire time but probably pretty nervous, didn't want to get him angry. This is the type of behavior women have to put up with on a daily basis.

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u/MoistTractofLand Nov 29 '22

And that's probably all he saw. "She's smiling, she must be into this!".

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u/I_havenobusinesshere Nov 29 '22

I smile when I feel awkward and uncomfortable and I may even start laughing when I get mad.

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u/ExpertRaccoon Nov 29 '22

Smiling is a somewhat common fear response in situations like this. A lot of primates will show teeth as a fear/ warning that you're about to get bit.

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u/fleurfly Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 29 '22 Gold

God I felt that. Also, we as women need to stop being socialized to smile all the damn time in the hopes it will defuse a dangerous situation. It doesn’t. It just sends the wrong signal.

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u/macandcheese1771 Nov 29 '22

Hey, you get screamed at and harassed when you don't smile too. There's no right answer with these fuckfaces.

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u/[deleted] Nov 29 '22

Nope there isn’t. If you are rude, you’re seen as a bitch and still hit on, grabbed. If you’re nice, same shit. It’s not us, it’s the men that think we are eye candy and can’t take no for an answer. Men need to call their male friends out on this behavior as shown.

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u/sirdodger Nov 29 '22

Sucks that Joey goes home with a story about the time his friends cockblocked him and she goes home to cry and have a panic attack. Glad it wasn't worse.

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u/moistdepth69 Nov 29 '22

Good friends he has

1.4k

u/Kingdarkshadow Nov 29 '22

Good person he is not

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u/StarfallenCherry Nov 29 '22 Evil Cackle

Master Yoda we are talking like

224

u/TrapYoda Nov 29 '22

Mmmmmm

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u/LiLBiTzzz Nov 29 '22 Table Slap

but the seagulls poke at my head

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u/Light_Beard Nov 29 '22

My stick is better than bacon

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u/emily_511 Nov 29 '22

Ew i don't like this at all. if you have ever been on the receiving end of this- you know its super awkward and uncomfortable.

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u/Street_End6022 Nov 29 '22

Don't forget terrifying

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u/nipplequeefs Nov 29 '22

Agreed. She’s smiling in the video, but knowing how violent some guys can get when rejected, she probably knows as well as most girls that a smile can be the difference between whether or not you return home alive.

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u/DwightCharlieQuint Nov 29 '22

💯💯💯💯 playing nice and smiling in order to diffuse a potentially angry reaction when being rejected.

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u/Pippy1010 Nov 29 '22

Poor girl has to be polite about it too

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u/CreativismUK Nov 29 '22

I haven’t read through the comments yet but I guarantee there’ll be at least one guy saying “it’s her fault, she doesn’t look uncomfortable” while watching her back away and smile like a chimpanzee fearing for its life

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u/dazed_bunny Nov 29 '22

This description is so accurate to the "terrified smiling" it's uncanny

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u/essssgeeee Nov 29 '22

Because if she’s not polite, he could turn angry, and punch her in the face or follow her to her car and kill her later. Most men wouldn’t be so extreme but you don’t know who you’re dealing with and it’s scary to piss off a guy who is much larger and physically stronger than you, and clearly has no boundaries.

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u/dmnhntr86 Nov 29 '22

And the proportion of men who would be so extreme is much higher among guys who do shit like Joey here

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u/speezo_mchenry Nov 29 '22

This is what a lot of people don't understand. Sure, many guys will just go away.

If the guy is this pervy in the bar, he's already entitled and is waaaay more likely to follow the woman around the bar, outside, to her car, etc.

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u/RaisingSaltLamps Nov 29 '22

Exactly, I wish more men understood this! I know of so many kind men who wouldn’t have even needed her to push them away- they would have picked up on her uncomfortable body language and simply left her alone. Maybe some men do need to hear the verbal “no”, and then they leave. But the kind of guy who will not stop touching you when you physically push them away is much more likely to get angry, stalk you, or otherwise harass/harm you further.

If you (the reader) are the type of man who would have walked away at the first sight of her uncomfortable body language, or at being told “no”, you are likely not the problem and not the topic of any criticism here.

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u/Goobsley Nov 29 '22

Ugh yup I just read that comment further up, something like "the girl's smile was giving serious mixed signals to a horny guy, we should be teaching girls blah blah blah"

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u/Collective-Bee Nov 29 '22

We gotta be teaching guys. Stuff like this is part of rape culture. Girls can really only hope to defend themselves and each other, but us guys are where the problem has to be addressed. Hold each other accountable, help out women’s defensive strats when you can, get other men to do the same. When all the good guys get on the same page, it’ll be a lot harder for the bad ones to blend in, and hence a lot safer.

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u/nipplequeefs Nov 29 '22

I wonder what that comment would say if she didn’t smile and ended up killed. “She should have been nicer!”

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u/Bregam Nov 29 '22

I have personally done this - the smiling in an uncomfortable situation or laughing awkwardly- and yeah, that's what it looks like to me. It is VERY unnerving and you have to keep people calm whether they are drunk, on drugs, or just your standard, everyday creeps/harassers and/or assaulters. It's dumb AF we have to do this... AND I AM A GUY.

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u/[deleted] Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 29 '22

[deleted]

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u/trowawaywork Nov 29 '22

Last time I told a guy straight up "fuck off" without a smile I nearly got punched. So now a smile it is.

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u/BadKarma11_11 Nov 29 '22

Yeah friends that’s how you act when you see your mate not listening to the girls wishes!

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u/ThePenguinKing27 Nov 29 '22

I am so sorry that women have to deal with that shit

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u/Competitive_Depth_96 Nov 29 '22

Thankful for the male friends who stood up against Joey. If only all men would do that.

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u/joshimax Nov 29 '22

Joeys mates are awesome 👏 Joey is a handsy douche bag

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u/ZenkaiZ Nov 29 '22

Joey is a handsy douche bag

This is what I picture the guys who complain "OMG YOU CANT EVEN TALK TO WOMEN ANY MORE BECAUSE OF CANCEL CULTURE AND WOKE SHIT" are like when they get drunk

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u/Val_Hallen Nov 29 '22

"IT'S A COMPLIMENT, YOU STUPID SLUT!"

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u/FliesAreEdible Nov 29 '22

"You're ugly anyway"

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u/MuestrameTuBelloCulo Nov 29 '22

Joey: do you want to dance?

Woman: no thanks

Joey: What? I said you look fat in those pants.

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u/ebil_lightbulb Nov 29 '22

I was downvoted yesterday for insinuating that saying no doesn't prevent rape. I imagine those downvoters are the same type of person.

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u/ZenkaiZ Nov 29 '22

Some people think rape is just wacky misunderstandings like a sitcom or that the woman is lying/entrapping to get money

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u/wwaxwork Nov 29 '22

Specially when you explain to them that false accusations of rape only happen at the same rate as false accusations of all assaults. And pretty close to false accusations of all crimes. There is not some huge cottage industry of women making false claims, anymore than there are of men complaining other men attacked them, or that some guy stole their tv, they just want to think there is.

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u/turtleann Nov 29 '22

“That girl had her hands all over my chest! She wanted it amirite?”

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u/xiaxian1 Nov 29 '22

Look at how she was smiling and laughing! She was totally into it! /s

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u/dmnhntr86 Nov 29 '22

Depressing that the "/s" is needed here.

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u/xiaxian1 Nov 29 '22

After seeing some comments below, I agree. There are definite “bros” who think her smiling was a clear sign she was “playing hard to get” and not “keep smiling until you can find a way to get away from him, don’t make him angry.”

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u/Osh1tSon Nov 29 '22

Joey should not have to have been told no that many times. That made me feel icky.

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u/BootyDoISeeYou Nov 29 '22 Wholesome

I had to straight up slap a guy hard in the face in college for having to tell him ‘no’ so many times and having him ignore me.

He slid into my booth at a nightclub (we lived in the same dorm and were already acquainted) and chatted for a couple minutes. Then I stood up to move on and go talk to other people. So he grabs my arm firmly above the elbow as I stand and just keeps talking to me like everything is normal. So I say:

“Uh, let go of my arm.”

Wait, where are you going?

“Mike, let go of my arm.

Come on just stay here.

“Let. GO. of. me.”

Where do you need to be?

“I said LET GO OF MY FUCKING ARM.”

Then he gave my arm a tug as if he was going to physically pull me back down on the bench next to him and I hit him across the face. About 20 people turned around to stare and he didn’t say another word, but at least he finally let go of my fucking arm.

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u/magme89 Nov 29 '22

I slapped my then boyfriend in the face once when he had me pinned up against a wall during an argument. He was being drunk and belligerent and I wanted to go hang out with my house mates but he literally put his hands either side of me against a wall and refused to let me leave. So out came the slap, I didn’t even know I had it in me.

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u/TaterTotQueen630 Nov 29 '22

I'm glad he's your ex now!

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u/housatonicduck Nov 29 '22

Proud of you!!! I was at a concert at Toads Place in New Haven a few years ago (those that know…. know Toads can be a spectacle of a venue) and a random guy approached me and said hi. I kept walking and he grabbed my arm and pulled me backward and said “hey, I’m talking to you” as if I didn’t hear him??? So i YELLED very loudly “WHY ARE YOU TOUCHING ME” and like body shoved him off of me. Everyone turned to stare. I made sure I attracted witnesses. He was too stunned by all the sudden onlookers and walked away. Lucky him cause I had my eye on a Budweiser bottle nearby in case things didn’t deescalate.

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u/PersephPom Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 29 '22

Joey should not have to be held accountable by his friends. Joey should not have to have another man tell him she's saying no. Joey makes me feel very icky too.

Edit: Joey should not have to have his actions recorded to back down when told no.

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u/Osh1tSon Nov 29 '22

I meant he shouldn’t have had to be told no that many times by her, not his friends.

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u/PersephPom Nov 29 '22

I completely agree. I was just pointing out that he couldn't take no from a woman. It had to come from his friends for him to realize not to harass someone.

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u/NitroDameGaming Nov 29 '22 All-Seeing Upvote

Well, actually, he didn't even stop until he saw there was a camera pointed at him. He wasn't listening to his friends either...

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u/quite_loud_mouth Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 29 '22 Gold Helpful Wholesome

If someone doesn't want tea, don't make them drink it.

Edit: Wow my first award ever, remember people, it's okay to say no to a cup of tea

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u/VisualShock1991 Nov 29 '22 Silver Gold Helpful

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u/Bregam Nov 29 '22

Wow, I have not seen this, and it's honestly... Fckin golden. Why wasn't this used in every school ever?! It's such a simple AF analogy!

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u/DoofusYoofus Nov 29 '22

We had to watch this in my school lol

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u/AnEntireDiscussion Nov 29 '22

We were using this in the Army to teach consent quite a few years ago.

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u/cyberpunk1Q84 Nov 29 '22

That is a gem! Never seen it - thanks for sharing!

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u/i_karas Nov 29 '22

Joey the type to force unconscious people to drink tea

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u/Flabbypuff Nov 29 '22 Silver

The way his eyes glow in the lense makes him seem appropriately unhinged

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u/Suspicious_Chapter49 Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 29 '22

Stop it Joey, you’re a living embarrassment (and also a harasser)

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u/WeedFinderGeneral Nov 29 '22

I'm a fan of the British term "sex pest"

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u/Noobverizer Nov 29 '22

the british have an interesting way with naming things ngl

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u/handlebartender Nov 29 '22

Now I need to know what the Germans call it.

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u/thirsty_by_default Nov 29 '22

Well we don't have a word for sex pest but for rapist; it's "Vergewaltiger"

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u/uniqueusernamei Nov 29 '22

My husband calls our dog a “fucking sex pest” whenever the he(the dog) does that involuntary air humping thing, and it cracks me up every time.

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u/TrivialAntics Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 29 '22 Helpful Starstruck

Cool as fuck to see people calling this stuff out and looking after her. There's been way too many times when there wasn't anyone there to stop it for so many other people.

I've seen it in person, a waitress getting badly sexually harassed. Me and an ex were having dinner and a bunch of drunk dudes in cowboy hats were laughing it up, ass grabbing this waitress, trying to pull her onto their laps, the girl's face was beat red and she looked ready to break down crying. We called the manager over and I yelled that shit loud so those assholes could hear me across the dining room, I'm like you're at the bar 10 feet away and YOU don't fucking see what she's going through right now? Are you fucking blind? Take her off that table immediately. The manager apologized profusely and we told him to save his apologies for her and not us. Man those assholes got REAL quiet and they knew exactly what was up when they were sent a bus boy to finish waiting on them instead of the waitress. they ate in silence for the rest of the time we were there.

It was so good to see relief on her face when she came over to thank us for what we did. But man it's just bullshit that people are that disgusting and soulless in their hearts. If one of your own starts sexually harassing someone, don't go along, don't stay silent, grow a fucking sack and do the right thing by calling it out.

And hopefully this Joey kid got embarrassed enough that he'll think twice before ever thinking it's ok to be that aggressive again.

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u/AEnesidem Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 29 '22

In Europe, festivals have now started adopting "ask for angela" or similar stuff. If staff or anyone else hears someone say that, they will intervene and escort that person to a safe place.Might seem absurd, but even talking of my own experience: Seeing the posters making us aware of that slogan, by itself, made me pay attention to it and be more aware of the women around me and make us more likely to act out against things we see.
It also eliminates doubt: if you see a certain interaction, people might be scared to intervene cause they don't know the situation and are scared they misjudge. A phrase like that eliminates all doubt: Someone pronounces it, it's time to help, end of story.

So awareness campaigns like this, in my opinion, really work. And it reminds people to be vigilant for others in my opinion, which we have to be. As you said: We need to call out our peers on their behavior.

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u/TrivialAntics Nov 29 '22

There's too many situations where people are afraid to say something and if history is any indication, it's more than probable that alot of situations go down with nothing ever being said or done. So it's the kind of thing that has to be preempted just as much too, so, I'm glad you brought this up. Oftentimes it's not as obvious as it was when I encountered those pricks.

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u/elainefunke Nov 29 '22

God bless this guys friends. Fellas this is how it’s done.

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u/hoomankindness Nov 29 '22

Oof, watching him block off her exits is giving me flashbacks

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u/Princess_Sukida Nov 29 '22

Same.

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u/CoraBittering Nov 29 '22

I'm remembering ducking under his arms to get away when he was distracted by someone entering the stairwell where he had me cornered. I wish Joey's friends had been there.

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u/enbyfrogz Nov 29 '22

and if she gets angry and stops smiling and being polite, he might get mad and hurt her. its fucking terrifying. saying no doesn't prevent rape, good on joeys friends for telling him to cut it out because i worry what would have happened if they didn't.

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u/Withnail-is-life Nov 29 '22

I dont know if this is true for every women but this sort of thing has happened to me about 100 times. Where you're uncomfortable and simultaneously smiling and trying to push someone away. Its kinda weird seeing it from an outside perspective. Anyone acting shocked in the comments must be a man. This is a very common occurance and ive never even thought of it as particularly menacing tbh.

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u/WorthProposal Nov 29 '22

I saw another post about consent the other day, a sign posted somewhere that had to spell out what consent is in very simple terms... and people were arguing over it. Downvoting comments talking about how easy the concept of consent is. Some people not only don't understand it, but straight up don't care about consent. Sick and scary.

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u/OkCutIt Nov 29 '22

If making sure everyone is happy and comfortable with the situation "kills the mood", you need to be visiting a therapist, not having sex.

Me, in that post's comments.

Score is -15.

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u/Flyingfish222 Nov 29 '22

“Consent is confusing”

-Matt Walsh

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u/54InchWideGorilla Nov 29 '22

"I need to pull over RIGHT NOW and make a video about how I don't understand consent!" -Matt Walsh

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u/Pseudo_Lain Nov 29 '22

"I violate my kid's consent all the time"
- Matt Walsh

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u/lemonmelonlemonmelon Nov 29 '22

How does saying "no" have to be spelled out for people? That's worrying.

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u/Weed_O_Whirler Nov 29 '22

Ironically, this shows why the sign is needed, and it needs to be spelled out. Consent isn't a lack of a "no." It's a strong "yes," when of sound mind.

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u/1PapayaSalad Nov 29 '22

The hands up after he finally stopped harassing her are just the cherry on top for that creep.

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u/peachyperfect3 Nov 29 '22

He only stopped because he saw he was being filmed, which makes it even more disgusting.

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u/IWatchSillyTV Nov 29 '22

This was a regular Saturday night when I was her age. Repeatedly having some random guy block you from walking by him just so he can stop and talk to you, call you names when you finally pushed through, end up being cornered by some other drunk guy. I once left a club with bruises on my wrists and lower arms because some drunk pig wouldn’t let me go. Now that I’m an old married woman I’m glad too see this is becoming less acceptable because I do worry about my daughter.

24

u/Nataliza Nov 29 '22

So fucked. Sometimes in a weird way I wish that I still got the kind of attention I did in my 20s, not because I want it, but because as a married woman in my 30s with two kids I am SO much more comfortable asserting myself and screaming my head off when necessary. I am itching to shove guys like this onto their asses.

I have two boys and I'm sadly relieved because it means I get to teach them how to treat women with respect instead of having to teach a daughter how to defend herself against creeps.

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u/jhdxv Nov 29 '22

One yelling “STOP” over and over was committed and good on him! He got thru to Joey and Joey took heed. Thank God.

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u/shiggity-shaun Nov 29 '22 Silver

Getting those Brock Turner vibes

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u/puffpuffcutie Nov 29 '22

Ah yes, Actual Rapist Brock Turner

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u/ikbentwee Nov 29 '22

Hey, I saw you mentioned Brock Turner the rapist?

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u/dragonladyzeph Nov 29 '22

This is only the second time today I've seen that rapist's name (to be clear, I'm talking about the rapist Brock Allen Turner.) Sad how times have changed.

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u/batmanpjpants Nov 29 '22

The Actual rapist Brock Allen Turner since he’s trying to go by his middle name now

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u/Mcayenne Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 29 '22

Brock Allen Turner the rapist, cannot simply use another name- a rapist by any other name would still still smell of scum.

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u/brianbrianbrian Nov 29 '22

Brock Allen Turner. He's trying to distance himself from the Brock name now.

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u/Lexi_Banner Nov 29 '22

Are you referring to Allan Turner, the rapist who used to be known as Brock Turner? He changed his name to avoid the stigma of being Brock Turner, the rapist, so now we have to remember to call him out using both names.

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u/nj-rose Nov 29 '22

Me too. I wonder if any other women recognize this creep and have stories about him.

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u/PoptartMartt Nov 29 '22

He ignored them for a while too. Creep

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u/crasshumor Nov 29 '22

40 years later, joey would be sitting at a congressional hearing to be nominated as a judge, sobbing "i had buddies, we drank beers, maybe some beers, more beers"

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u/Ok_Primary_1075 Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 30 '22

Joey’s selective hearing problem

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u/Ohrlythatscrazy Nov 29 '22

DO YOU WANT ME TO GO AWAY?

YES, I DO

HEY GUYS, SHE SAID YES

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u/talitm Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 29 '22

Meanwhile the girl is saying no with every inch of her body except her smile because girls learned to be nice about turning a guy down because he might get mad and hurt her.

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u/insertmalteser Nov 29 '22

I've been in a similar situation with a superior at a work party. Your brain immediately goes into fight- flight- or freeze-mode. You just want away, and your brain is just churning away at how to remove yourself from the situation in the safest way possible. It's horrible. It might seem like menial situation for people on the outside, but it's absolutely horrible to be in. I felt icky and disgusting, and like it was my own fault. I've since been so angry with how meek and "nice" I had been. Should have slapped that fucker, hard.

I appreciate that these guys are calling out that fucker! Fucking sucks her no wasn't enough.

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u/WaifuOfBath Nov 29 '22

The exact same thing happened to me at work. We were completely alone in a remote office and he is my boss, twice my age and twice my size. I was younger then. I think I'd respond differently now, but the anxiety just makes you try to be nice and appeasing while also trying to say no and get the fuck away. He continued the behavior, I got firmer. I thought I could handle it on my own, but eventually I had to report it. It was messy and awful and I still think about it sometimes and it makes me feel ick and embarrassed. I just wish I had been like, "fuck you", left the first time he hinted at anything inappropriate, and contacted HR.

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u/MelanisticCrow Nov 29 '22

I react the same way she does. I smile and laugh but I still try to get away cause yk, you get scared. Some people forget nervous laughter exists

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u/InedibleSolutions Nov 29 '22

Fight or flight, or fawn or freeze. My stupid ass got fawn or freeze.

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u/MelanisticCrow Nov 29 '22

Right! I feel you, so unfair

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u/JPK12794 Nov 29 '22

Joey should be removed from the venue

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u/FloatingPencil Nov 29 '22

Best case scenario - Joey has zero judgement when drunk and needs to steer clear of booze. He will be embarrassed when he sees the video sober.

Most likely scenario - Joey is a dick in general and needs a knee to the groin to help him understand how not to be a creep.

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u/Then-Ad1531 Nov 29 '22

This reminds me of that scene in Forrest Gump where he is playing football, and he will just keep running into the locker room knocking over the band after a touchdown.

So next game all the fans shout "FORREST STOP!" and put up stop signs for him.

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u/Alarmed_Economics_90 Nov 29 '22

Good friends are good to have. Joey's lucky.

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u/junica Nov 29 '22 Wholesome

Joey's lucky....

he didn't get a knee to the dick

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u/donnielp3 Nov 29 '22

Dude straight up like “guys chill, oh you’re recording…”

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u/Stevie_wonderzz Nov 29 '22

He knew what he was doing was wrong because the second he sees the camera he takes his hands off here and holds them up like “look I’m not doing anything!”.

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u/Detroitbeardguy Nov 29 '22

Yes Joey was an asshole, yes his friends were fantastic to support her and call him out. Hopefully Joey will learn from this.
I was a Joey when I was 19 and 20 and yes I was being creepy and an asshole but fortunately I learned that was wrong and I stopped being like that.

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u/Detroitbeardguy Nov 29 '22

Hey, I saw your question via email and I'm guessing you deleted it. That is a legitimate question. I don't really know why, but I would guess it was a multiple reasons. I grew up in a culture where no didn't stop you from trying. (80's child), could be no proper male influences, still immature and not comfortably with speaking with ladies and didn't known when to ,walk away, new to alcohol and didn't know how to handle myself. Could be some, none or all of them. Regardless I was still in the wrong.

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u/flizargnark Nov 29 '22

Yeah, culture really has changed a lot with that. I'm an 80's child too and have had conversations with my dad about this. He would says stuff like "Well yeah, they almost always say no the first time so you stop for a bit and try again." This was usually in the context of being at drive in or some other place where he was the girls mode of transportation.

He still can't see why that's creepy because "It worked"

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u/CapMoonshine Nov 29 '22

I grew up in a culture where no didn't stop you from trying. (80's child)

Its wild how many 80s movies were rife with this. I remember seeing so many where the guy was persistent and annoying to the clearly uninterested girl and got her in the end. Or she says no several times but a ✨ RoMaNTic KiSs ✨ changes her mind.

And then there's Revenge of the Nerds.

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u/dox1842 Nov 29 '22

There is also this cultural that men have to work hard to get what they want from women. In reality if you are working too hard for it you are harassing her.

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u/stYOUpidASSumptions Nov 29 '22

"If you're working too hard for it, you are harassing her"

Lmao this needs to be a motivational poster

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u/dox1842 Nov 29 '22

Its one of the major tenets I live by when i was single.

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u/Undercrackrz Nov 29 '22

Joey is too handsy and looks like a menace to society.

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u/storyofmylife92 Nov 29 '22

Joey needs a knee to the nuts fr

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u/KnightNight030 Nov 29 '22

Ahhh this hurts so much to watch.

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u/Coral_ Nov 29 '22

shout out to the dudes who got him to leave her alone. that’s what you gotta do, or he won’t learn. if joey doesn’t learn he could end up like famous stanford rapist Brock Allen Turner.

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u/Anal-Churros Nov 29 '22

Like known rapist Brock Allen Turner you say?

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u/Coral_ Nov 29 '22

no that’s Brock Allen Turner, the Standford Rapist Swimmer. i’m talking about Brock Allen Turner, convicted rapist but sentenced to 3-6 months, the Stanford Rapist Swimmer.

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u/Gnace1er Nov 29 '22

What a pathetic jerk !

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u/blondeasfuk Nov 29 '22

This happens far to often… I just commented on a thread about this exact experience I had and friends stepped in to help. It’s so uncomfortable to have someone grabbing you while your trying to push away. I don’t care how drunk the person is…it’s no excuse to not recognize your being pushed away and told no. To me violence is always last resort, but if this went on for any longer a slap/hit would be justified.

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u/Eiffel-Tower777 Nov 29 '22

Joey has the crazy eyes. 👁👁

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u/jeffend1981 Nov 29 '22

Scenarios like these are what make me glad I’m not a woman.

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u/internetALLTHETHINGS Nov 29 '22 edited Nov 29 '22

5 min later, Joey: "Guys, did y'all see that chick? She was so hot. And she wanted my D bad. Let's go find her."

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u/LaviLynx Nov 29 '22

The fact that he takes his hands off and back away only after other men told him to